The Revenge of Hipster Ariel


Sub-cultures. Most of them wind up becoming so insanely popular that they come closer to being mainstream culture than they would probably like. This is a pure and honest fact of the interconnected world. If you post a picture of you dressed in the appropriate attire of your particular sub-culture and a heretofore unaffiliated person enjoys that style, they may endeavor to copy that style.

This is what happened to steampunk in latter years. I’ve never considered myself a part of that particular sub-culture, but I admire the style and have even tinkered with writing a steampunk fantasy story of which, admittedly, the particulars about the perceived tech-level were a bit underestimated, but that’s a tale for another time.

I’m sure there was some resistance from the steampunk community when the popularity of their sub-culture began to truly blossom. I’m sure some of that resistance is still out there, even with the growing amount of converts and conventions. It’s part of the little bit of hipster in all of us to resent noobs to anything, especially when its something you may have done for years. For personal reference, I was a Renaissance Faire pirate before the Pirates of the Caribbean movies came out. I resent every noob pirate I see at the Faire because I’ve been doing it for over a decade. I am the proverbial mother fucking OG.

Things may have got a bit too nerdy there for a moment. No shame in my game.

There are also the scenesters. For instance, the Goths, who were damned into mass appeal around the minute Marilyn Manson hit the airwaves. No offense to Mr. Manson, I am still something of a fan, but Goth cred went straight out the window the minute mass appeal set in. Music brought people to the lifestyle, the lifestyle over-inflated and eventually evolved into the horror known as Emo over the natural progression of things. But, again, that’s a story for another day.

All of this leads to an article I read today about an obscure scene/lifestyle called Seapunk. Yes, this is a real thing. It’s what they’re terming as a “microscene”. As with most scenes, it associates with a particular type of music (electronica) and has a particular mode of dress. The mode of dress involves a lot of blues, greens, and teals, tye-dyes, wet-suits, and generally trying to look like Angelina Jolie in Hackers. Dated reference, but there it is. Further research indicates that the “’90s cyberpunk aesthetic” is one of their key tenets, which lends even more credence to Acid Burn being their one true God.

They’re not shocking by any means. They’re not anything truly out of the ordinary other than the fact that Ecco the Dolphin is one of their main mascots and most of them buy oversized cutoff fluorescent blue t-shirts with images of sea creatures on them like you may have done yourself in the five minutes you decided that saving the whales was a worthy cause to support by buying mass produced clothing in the 90s. Oh, and they like to dye their hair blue, teal, or green. Again, not a shocker in this era, but it seems to be the most extreme of their deviance.

The reason I bring up this microscene is because they are up in arms regarding Rhianna’s recent performance on SNL. Rhi portrayed their style on stage during a fairly psychedelic first number on last Saturday’s broadcast. They’re not mad that she didn’t do it right, on the contrary, they’re upset because she did it too well.

The community believes that their microscene was unfairly mainstreamed and has taken to the internet to protest this fact.

No, seriously. Let that sit in your brain and stew for a while before it melts and dribbles out of your ear holes.

Is this what things are coming to, hipsters? I understand, as I mentioned previously, the hatred for noobs, but I would be more flattered than angry if someone big in the entertainment industry picked up on a mega-niched fashion trend that I started. It’s the ultimate “I did it before it was cool”. Doesn’t that appeal to your sort of mindset?

In short, STFU and deal with the fact that someone, myself severely excluded, digs your style enough to copy it. Eventually, every niche that ever existed gets mainstreamed. Don’t complain about it, profit on it. Use that amazing fashion knowledge you believe you have and run with it. Stop whining that your tiny little trend is getting bigger and revel in the fact that you were actually, for once and for truly, at the forefront of something.

Or just fade into obscurity. Either way, I don’t really give a damn. I just thought it was funny you were bitching about it.

Keep fighting the good fight. (as in, not the stupid fight like this one)

—end transmission—

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